How To: Handle Losing Your Job

By Michael Hirsch
Lifestyle Correspondent

So you lost your job. Find us a man who hasn't lost a job in his life and we'll show you a man who works for the government. Luckily, you still have your health. Life could be worse.

Whether you were fired or laid off, your first reaction to losing your job will most likely be shock, followed by anger. You might be tempted to tell your boss where he can shove his briefcase -- but that's a bad idea. Keep your mouth shut and follow these seven steps to successfully handle losing your job.

1- Negotiate a severance package
"Success is not final, failure is not fatal: it is the courage to continue that counts."
-Winston Churchill

Many companies will give you at least two weeks' severance pay. Some will give you up to a year's pay, depending on whether you were fired or laid off. If possible, contact other employees who were previously let go and ask them how much they received when they left the company. This way you'll know what's fair and have a monetary value to shoot for.

Additionally, you are legally entitled to be paid for unused vacation time. If you think you're not getting a fair severance package, consult a labor attorney. You should be able to get a free consultation to find out whether or not you have a case.

2- Ask for references
"The measure of a man is the way he bears up under misfortune."
-Plutarch

Your direct boss and other company executives you worked with should be willing to provide you with a positive reference or recommendation. Unless, of course, you were caught in the copier room with the boss' girlfriend during the company Christmas party, or you stole from your company, in which case you probably deserved to lose your job.

It's in your former employer's best interest that you find another job, so you don't put a major dent in their unemployment insurance fund (and that's something that should help you handle losing your job). Once you're on the payroll at a new company, your previous company is off the hook for the payments.

Additionally, in our litigious society, everyone's afraid of being sued. So, your former employer will be reluctant to say or write anything negative about your work performance, unless you were actually charged with a crime. Make it easy on your boss, and volunteer to write a letter of recommendation yourself that he can review and sign.

3- Leave with class
"Nothing gives a person so much advantage over another as to remain always cool and unruffled under all circumstances."
-Thomas Jefferson

You might feel like you were treated unfairly and did not deserve to be let go. But life isn't always fair, and neither are employers. So hold your head up high, and with a smile on your face thank your boss for the opportunity he gave you to work at his company. Then walk out the door, never to return, and don't look back.

Your employer will respect you for the way you've handled this difficult experience. And you'll leave him thinking about the great employee he lost. You never know when a new job opportunity with your boss might arrive at another company in the future.

4- Apply for unemployment benefits
"No great man ever complains of want of opportunity."
-Ralph Waldo Emerson

The next step to handle losing your job is to apply for unemployment benefits as soon as possible. This is no time for excessive pride and there's no shame in collecting unemployment. You might not realize that you're actually bilking your ex-employer, not the government. The company pays your benefits out of its unemployment insurance fund.

Whether you're getting severance pay or not, you're eligible for unemployment. Go to your local office of the State Department of Employment Security and apply for benefits, which are based on a percentage of your previous salary.

5- Have a little fun
"Empty pockets never held anyone back. Only empty heads and empty hearts can do that."
-Norman Vincent Peale

Before you start looking for a new job, take at least a week to relax and recharge your batteries. Commiserate with your buddies over a few drinks at your favorite bar. Take that vacation you never had time for before.

Use this free time to meet and date women, but don't tell the new girls you meet that you're unemployed. Put a positive spin on your current employment status. Depending on your career, tell the ladies you're "switching careers," an "independent contractor," a "consultant," or a "freelancer." You'll get further with them than you would by telling them you're currently jobless.

6- Hit the pavement for a new gig
"Consider the postage stamp: its usefulness consists in the ability to stick to one thing until it gets there."
-Josh Billings

Update your resume and go get a job. Aside from applying the traditional way by sending out resumes, post it on career sites like Monster.com and let employers come to you.

Once you start getting interviews, don't tell potential employers that you were fired. After all, you wouldn't tell a woman you just met that your last girlfriend dumped you. In the wake of the recent recession, potential employers are accustomed to seeing candidates who have been laid off. So, it's not the kiss of death.

Don't lie, but don't volunteer information to potential employers regarding why you left your previous job. If they ask, use one of the following phrases to explain:
"I was downsized in corporate restructuring" or "My department was shut down."
Keep in mind that your previous employer can only confirm the date when you were hired and when you left. By law, they cannot comment on whether you left or they let you go.

7- Use this time to improve yourself
"The successful warrior is the average man, with a laser-like focus."
-Bruce Lee

While you're looking for a new job, use your free time to improve yourself and improve your chances of finding a job. Avoid detrimental, time-wasting activities such as watching TV and drinking beer during the day. One of the key ways to handle losing your job is to stay focused without beating yourself up too hard.

Instead, do something productive. Learn a new language to help widen your job opportunities. Take a class on public speaking to improve your speech skills. Attend networking events in your chosen field, where you can meet people who know of job openings. Or, find an unpaid internship in a new career area you're interested in. It might lead to you being hired on in a paid position.

Volunteer at a charity to meet people, especially women. Write that novel you've always dreamed of. Focus on your health by working out and eating well.
handle losing your job like a man

Regular exercise will help you stave off depression, improve your mental clarity and enable you to focus on your job search. Upgrade your personal style and wardrobe to present a professional image for yourself. You'll feel better, look better and gain more confidence.

Now, get to work.



source: Askmen.com